By Aungelina Dahm
High school. It’s a world of petty girl fights, crushing on the boy next to you in class and worrying about your next AP test.
No matter if you’re a freshman, sophomore, junior or senior, you have or probably will experience some of the exciting instances stated above.
I’m not here to threaten the freshman on what not to do when they come into high school, but now that I’m a senior and know a thing or two about Prospect, I feel I should share some tips (not just for freshman, but for every dime piece here at PHS) on how to survive and thrive here in the White Castle.
1. Read #incomingfreshmanadvice on Twitter. Trust me.
This hashtag has some of the most sarcastic yet clever tweets I’ve ever seen, but if you actually take some of them seriously, you’re going to have a really rough year.
It’s extremely likely that by the time you are a senior girl you will be able to relate to this tweet in some way or another. You can either hate yourself for it later or embrace it while it happens … I did both.
This is a double whammy. I’m teaching you how to be lighthearted while also giving you an outlet to where you can access very funny but accurate guidance. You’re welcome.
2. Do all the stuff you said you would never do in middle school. It will make for a better story later.
I left my goody two-shoes at home the day I stepped into high school. For the purpose of not getting in trouble with the administration, I have to say I am not encouraging any illegal behavior or wrongdoing.
All I’m saying is go out and have fun while you’re still stupid enough to do so. That way in a few years, when you realize all the stuff you did really was stupid, you’ll be able to say you learned from your mistakes but also had fun in the meantime.
See, it’s just a revolving cycle that I have learned to master. You probably will too.
3. Boys are kind of like your favorite little black dress.
They’re great to have on a special night out when you want to feel and look good, but in the meantime you can keep them wherever and forget about it. Then when one doesn’t fit quite right anymore, or you’re bored and want something new, you can toss it to the side and go out shopping for a new one.
That was an extended analogy from a girl who is way too preoccupied in high school to worry about getting in a meaningful relationship. I already have way too much stress in my life to worry about someone else’s feelings.
Harsh? You’ll understand one day that not caring about the little things will make you happier and much more successful.
4. Be nice. That’s it.
It may come as a shocker that throughout my high school years, I wasn’t always the nicest girl. I have friends that still tell me now, “I would’ve started talking to you sooner if you didn’t look so mean.”
OK. Yes, I had my moments, but I’m a generally nice person I just suffer from a case of RBF. Look it up.
Don’t walk in the hallway with your line of betches on Wednesday all wearing pink and staring everyone else down. This is not Mean Girls. No one else will be afraid of you. It does not scream “Don’t mess with me. I’m a bad chick.” It screams, “I have no self confidence, and this is what I need to do to feel cool.”
Staaaahhhhhhpp. You will have a higher quantity and quality of friends if you aren’t shy in class. It might come as news to most of you, but the easiest way to meet someone new is to say, “Hi” first in class.
I know I didn’t really want to do that when I was a freshie, but I sure as hell wish I had. I would’ve been able to meet my friends much sooner than I have.
5. Don’t call yourself a freshie.
6. If you do choose to go against my advice and be in a high school relationship, don’t be them.
All in all, my feelings won’t be terribly hurt if you don’t follow the advice I have generously given you. But if you chose to not abide by any of them and think u r 2 kool 4 skool, you’re not. Bye.