Today is the day we’ve all been waiting for. After months of anticipation and hype, weeks full of advent calendar openings and countdowns, the day has finally arrived.
Happy national asphalt day!
As everyone knows, May 15th is the widely celebrated national asphalt day. There’s so much to celebrate! Like asphalt!
I mean, who doesn’t love asphalt, right? It’s such an amazing invention that it’s no wonder it has its own day! Why wouldn’t it?
However, May 15th also has other, clearly lesser holidays like national family day. I mean, who cares about one’s family when we can put our faith and love into asphalt? Frankly, I find it extremely offensive that they would dare to place these days on my glorious king asphalt day!
Okay, I can’t keep the act up anymore. No, I’m not actually obsessed with national asphalt day. Probably. But that’s beside the point. The point, of course, is “Why the hell is there a national asphalt day?”
I mean, asphalt day may not even be the dumbest national holiday out there – hell, maybe not even the dumbest one that’s today! Just today, there’s nylon stockings day, straw hat day, who could forget about vascular birthmarks awareness day?
I found all of these on nationalholidaytoday.com, which is a rabbit hole you don’t want to fall into. There are so, SO many random holidays that are honestly kind of addicting to scroll through. Every time I think I find the dumbest, most specific one, something like national Linda day pops up (yeah, literally just for the name “Linda”). After that, of course, I have to find something even goofier.
I mean, some of these aren’t even consistent. National bike to school day AND national walk to school day are both on the 17th! Which one is it guys?! Make up your damn mind!
These inconsistencies, as well as just how goofy all of this is, made me curious to how these days actually come to be. As for nationalholidaytoday.com, you can pay $30 to create a holiday about whatever you want, whenever you want.
Of course, these aren’t official national holidays that will show up on every standard calendar you buy in stores, but considering how nationalholidaytoday.com is kinda the place to look up these obscure holidays, it’s pretty cool that you can just make them.
The website asks for a ton of stuff, though, so it wouldn’t be easy to just BS something onto there. If you want to make a national “I hate national holidays” holiday, you need background of the subject, a historical timeline, some images, and people who support your viewpoint (which you probably won’t find for a national holiday about hating national holidays).
As cool as the ability for anyone to create a holiday is, it does make me question the legitimacy of the website a little bit. I mean, you’re telling me that the website with a national paperclip day isn’t 100% legitimate?! No way!
At the end of the day, as stupid as they may be, national holidays are an excuse to celebrate something niche. Something that we may take for granted. It’s just fun to go online and go, “Hey, today’s national put a pillow on your fridge day!” Then maybe you go ahead and put a pillow on your fridge. Or you don’t. But either way it IS national put a pillow on your fridge day, and you’ll be damned if anyone tells you otherwise.
